Writing for me is kinda like the end of a thousand a day in a pig bank. . ..(but you do know that at the end of 1000 days that’s 1million off fitting currency in a hole… Lol! New Year Credo — “JUST FIT IT”! Well, I collect memories. Hardly ever, does any detail skip my mind but as the year comes to a close, its been my way of reevaluating my life from a 3rd eye point of view. Sometimes brutally — well, most times.
Amidst the several reactions to personal blogging (the misuse of the term blogger inclusive) I’ve long been infatuated with honesty… You know, borderline dysfunction & imperfection .. all because there are too many “perfect” people, too many calculated eventualities, too many people with a plan for everything & there’s “me” sitting hunty in my imperfect corner, day after day planning only to be in the moment of things right as they occur.
Well, “Different strokes” actually.
7:53AM today, I rounded off with an interview & the fine lady wanted to know if I had any resolutions in view of the coming year. (…which is just a couple of hours in waiting)
But honest to God, 2014 was a terrible mess for me. The only thing twice as bad as failing is stagnation (& NO! I’m not your pastor 🙈) & for me, what was missing was simple. I was causally entering into the new year without a hint of purpose, no idea of what needed fixing, without a plan.
I struggled until I learned that growth actually begins WHEN YOU START TO CHECK YOURSELF….like; Why am I in this line of business?, for some, why am I still fucking this man?, what is my financial status?, why am I always in debt?, what are successful people doing differently? the list is endless. But you get the point… It all starts with honesty.. The type that begins with introspection.
I told myself several uncomfortable truths this same time last year & 2015 was for the most part, fucking LIT for me… Well, not in every sense, but mentally, financially, in my understanding of the business sphere …& sexually too! 😂 still working on the spiritual aspect. — “Dear, Vagina…”.
Contrary to several belief systems, A Resolution isn’t meant to take away the FUN in your life… Heck! I could talk about sucking dick, why black lives matter, gender inequality & still slay in real time. The goal clearly, is individual and extremely personal. What requires fixing might be something as simple as the decision to “TAKE CHARGE OF YOUR VAGINA”
(Why do I feel like I’m speaking for myself here lol)
Reality is distorted on several social media platforms but when you wake up, you realize that what matters isn’t your following to follower ratio…. What counts is that there is a significant change in key aspects of your life, that you have a family that cares about you, that your business(es) and team stay on a high note, that you are actually making money not arguing about it, that you have a mental picture of what you want out of life, that your circle stays small, & the loyalty of those who love you, unwavering.
But it begins with asking yourself..
“WHAT NEEDS FIXING?????”
I can’t tell you how many times you actually need to get back to the drawing board to get it right (I don’t have the answer to that, I’ve not finished fixing my life tbvfh!)… But it’s a no-brainer that each time you get back on that drawing board (as many times as you can & have) every little change you ever make on it, will leave you different in some way & that’s the thrill of it all, —Progress.
The painful part of this process is that the change has to start from inside… deep deep deep down, in the bid to identify & treat the cause.
So it may take a while to see any “substantial” change but that is not to say that there aren’t any. . . The 1yr life span we place on our resolution makes us feel like we’ve failed if we couldn’t touch base with them… Nah! The resolution doesn’t stop… It is simply versions of personal development at an individual pace.
So If you’re genuinely doing all you can, & still failing, maybe the only thing that needs fixing is your attitude towards life & those old habits that die hard.
Have a beautiful 2016!!!!!!!!!!!
With love — Vyne